I just don’t enjoy intimacy with him

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I have been feeling resentful towards my partner for a few months now and this is only because we are not physically compatible. I don't enjoy sex with him, and it makes me feel as if he isn't trying enough. There is nothing else wrong with our relationship and we genuinely enjoy being with each other. Is this reason enough to end this? I don't want to regret it a few months down the line because I know it will be hard for me to find someone like him again. At the same time, I can't just ignore the aspect of intimacy that is also crucial for our future together.
You are self-aware enough to recognise that intimacy is important, as is the need for compatibility. Relationships are about give and take, and about trying to understand each other. If you have problems with intimacy, ending your relationship is not the solution. It simply implies that you are unwilling to do something to fix the problem. This may happen time and again with other issues, which means your relationship will always be at risk unless you confront a problem and work towards it together. Start by telling your partner about your sexual needs, how they aren't being met, and what you think can be done about it. Give him a chance to talk about this from his perspective and evaluate the things that make you both want to be with each other. If all else fails, speak to a professional counsellor or sex therapist. Giving up is easy, but working through problems can lead to strong, mature bonds that last.

There is a guy who really likes me a lot, but I know that he is considered a bit of a player who dates multiple women. How can I trust him?
You have to see if his actions match his words, because there is no other way. Walk into this with your eyes open, ask questions, and look for red flags. This can only be resolved with time.

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